Spirtually starving

One Way

I lay my life down at Your feet
Cause You're the only one I need
I turn to You and You are always there
In troubled times it's You I seek
I put You first that's all I need
I humble all I am all to You
One way
Jesus
You're the only one that I could live for
One Way
Jesus
You're the only one that I could live for
You are always, always there
Every how and everywhere
Your grace abounds so deeply within me
You will never ever change
Yesterday today the same
Forever till forever meets no end
You are the Way the Truth and the Life
We live by faith and not by sight for You
We're living all for You

Today i danced around singing along to One Way. I danced with spring in my step and joy in my voice, i felt the freedom Christ has given my. I looked at my son as he sat on the floor applauding me and my dancing and tears streamed down my face.

My heart longed to feel this freedom at all time, to be able to sing with such joy and dance with a spring infront of people and at a church. I am not embarrassed to worship God, i am proud. But i feel there is something holding me back, and that something is fear. I am fearful of what people will think of my singing and probably my dancing to. I know i can overcome this though.

I am about to embark on a new journey, moving out of home. I move out of the home where i spent my childhood and where i do find security at times, into a new home with my best friend and her beautiful children. I leave childhood behind and welcome womanhood completely.

I am about to start life walking on the right path, thanks to the generousity of my sister Lami and the plan of my Heavenly Father. I will start a church and have a church family, my first "real" church. All my life i have grown up in a town where i can't go to church, we were taken to a catholic one when we were children on occasions such as funerals, marriages and christenings. I have never belonged to a church or had a church family- so i'm very excited.

I hunger to learn more and more about Christ, want to be more like Jesus and i want to be so much more. There is so much i am yet to understand, so much more i can know and will learn in time!

I want to experience living life to the full and i want my son to experience it aswell. Lachlan deserves to see his Ma on fire for Christ, so he can learn and be feed spiritually.

Lord,
I thank you for the life you have given me and my son, i thank you for freedom you gave us. I thank you that my sins have been paid for! I ask that if there is any leaf left unturned in my garden of sin Lord, which i know there is that you reveal them to me one by one so i can repent and learn a different way if i have not done so. You have blessed me so much with the provisions in my life, and i am here to serve you. I open my arms and ask that you use me to serve you in any way i can. I also ask that you work on my heart, help heal the wounds and work through my issues.
I love you Lord, i always will.
Amen



I'm absolutely convinced that nothing--nothing living or dead, angelic or demonic, today or tomorrow, high or low, thinkable or unthinkable--absolutely nothing can get between us and God's love because of the way that Jesus our Master has embraced us.
Romans 8:38-39 (The Message)